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child custody

Aug 09

The Benefits of Parallel Parenting After a Divorce

Reasons to Consider Parallel Parenting After Your Divorce

Although the divorce rate in the United States has been dropping for about 20 years, nearly 39% of first marriages end in a divorce. Many of these marriages include young children, and conflict around parenting and child custody is one of the primary areas of contention discussed with a divorce lawyer. One way that divorcing couples can reduce stress and conflict and minimize time in the courtroom is to create a plan for parallel parenting of their children.

What Is Parallel Parenting?

Parallel parenting is a method of raising children in which the divorced parents minimize interactions with each other. Instead of arguing with each other, they focus their time and energy on their children. This is an effective parenting method when you and your ex-spouse have difficulty being civil with each other.

How Does Parallel Parenting Differ From Co-Parenting?

In a co-parenting situation, parents regularly communicate with each other, present a united front, and have similar rules at each residence. It involves a lot of cooperation and communication. Parallel parenting divides parenting responsibilities and minimizes interactions between the adults. By dividing responsibilities and following the plan, the parents may rarely need to interact with each other.

Who Should Consider Parallel Parenting?

Divorced couples who can’t seem to agree on anything should consider developing a parallel parenting plan with a divorce lawyer. Instead of focusing on problems with each other, this plan focuses on the well-being of the children. Minimizing interaction between the divorced parents also reduces stress and the amount of time that is spent in a courtroom.

How Does Parallel Parenting Benefit Divorcing Parents?

A parallel parenting plan allows both parents to remain active in their children’s lives. It minimizes the stress on each other and disruption for the children. A successful parallel parenting plan demonstrates that parents can focus on what’s best for their children instead of their disagreements, dislike, or distrust for each other. The plan creates guidance for common issues that are likely to breed conflict, such as where children will spend the holidays or which parent will deal with behavioral problems at school. A well-thought parallel parenting plan also makes it easier for divorced parents to move on with their lives after a marriage filled with conflict and arguments.

How Do Children Benefit from Parallel Parenting?

When parents establish a parallel parenting plan, children tend to develop fewer behavioral and emotional problems. They’re more likely to do better in school, develop strong friendships, and have positive relationships with each parent. Parallel parenting also helps children build better self-esteem, and they may be able to avoid feeling as if they were the cause of their parents’ marital problems or the reason for the divorce.

What Should I Include in a Parallel Parenting Plan?

A plan for parallel parenting should include as many specifics as possible. Although you can’t possibly anticipate every event or emergency that could occur with your child or ex-spouse, some elements that you should cover include the start and end of each parent’s visiting time, how and where your child will be exchanged, who is responsible for transporting your child, what happens if one parent misses or cancels their scheduled visit and when each parent has exclusive decision-making power. Some other aspects of parenting to add to your plan include who will take your child to medical and dental appointments, how to handle accidents and injuries, scheduling social, school, and religious activities, and dealing with behavioral issues and daily routines.

If you’re considering a divorce and would like to know more about parallel parenting, you may benefit from speaking with a divorce lawyer. Contact the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner in Jenkintown, Pennsylvania, at (215) 886-1266, or enter your information into our contact form, and an associate will reach out to you to schedule a consultation.

Jan 19

Co-Parent Relocation With Your Child After a Pennsylvania Divorce

Judges Approve Relocations That Benefit Children

Anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher, Ph.D., reports that divorce within eight years of getting married results from disappointment, unmet expectations, financial problems, substance abuse, or even physical or emotional abuse. Divorce impacts your children psychologically, physically, academically, and behaviorally. Your children need a strong family, support system, and home where they are loved and can express their emotions.

Moving With Your Child After Divorce

Relocation under Pennsylvania law is open to interpretation, and it means you must modify or renegotiate child custody, time-sharing plans, and how and when you and your partner will each be with your children. Pennsylvania law defines relocation as “a change in the residence of the child, which significantly impairs the ability of a non-relocating party to exercise custodial rights.” Our family divorce lawyer can help you to mediate a cost-effective way to change your child custody agreement.

Notification of Interested Parties

Changing your child’s home address requires the signed approval of all who have access to the child under your existing court order or a judge’s approval. The relocating parent must formally notify all parties at least 60 days prior to the move. Co-parents must agree and negotiate a parenting plan that’s in the best interest of both you and your children.

Modification of Your Child Custody Order

The non-relocating parent is obligated to agree with the petitioner and negotiate new co-parenting or visitation arrangements or object to the proposed move by stating objections. If the co-parent or a biological parent objects to the change, the judge schedules a hearing. You should never simply move with your child because you can be held in contempt of court and ordered to return the child to your co-parent.

Relocation Hearing

The judge considers alcohol or substance abuse, DUI convictions, spousal or child abuse, and the contribution of each parent to the financial support of the child. Generally, it’s important to maintain a relationship with your child to be considered for visitation or joint custody, but an absent parent may be granted visitation or custody if the petitioning parent is not a good choice.

The judge will approve changes that benefit your child financially, emotionally, or educationally. For example, your child may benefit when you take on a higher-paying job. The judge may decide moving closer to family and friends increases your children’s support network and approve your move.

Mediation of Child Custody Issues

Our family divorce lawyer with more than 30 years’ worth of experience can help you to mediate a cost-effective solution to the modification of your child custody order. Agreeing on child custody issues and creating an amicable relationship between co-parents is best for your children. If you intend to appear in court with a lawyer, you’ll have to pay legal fees. A judge will consider the physical availability of the child to the non-relocating parent, including time-sharing, the distance between the homes, how the child will travel from one house to the other, and who will pay for the trip.

Competing Presumptions

Relocation with a child after divorce opens up the issue of child custody for all parties who are interested in each child. Competing presumptions allow a biological parent to seize the opportunity to gain joint custody or visitation that they, otherwise, did not enjoy. A DNA test determines who is a child’s biological father, but the judge has the right to decide that another man is your child’s legal father. A biological father can file for custody of his child if his wife is the co-parent attempting to relocate. If your child is a teenager, the judge will ask your child where he or she wants to live.

Law Office of Joanne Kleiner

Call our family divorce lawyer at (215) 886-1266 today to schedule a confidential consultation in our conveniently located Jenkintown office. You can meet with us before you change your residence or respond to a petition from a co-parent who hopes to relocate with your child. Our family lawyer may be able to help you if you are a child’s biological parent who hopes to gain joint custody or visitation rights with your children.

Nov 22

How to Handle Co-Parenting and the Risk of COVID-19 Infection

Sharing Custody During a Pandemic: Navigating COVID-19 Risks

According to the National Library of Medicine, only 60 percent of children lived with their married biological parents in 2009 compared to 84 percent in 1970. This leaves about 40 percent of children potentially traveling between two households. As COVID-19 infection rates soar across the United States, this puts children and both sets of custodial parents at an increased risk of becoming infected or passing it on to other members of either household.

Sheltering in Place Contradicts Shared Custody Arrangements

The amount of COVID-19 cases is increasing in most states as of October 2020. Public health experts and local officials continue to recommend that people shelter in place in their homes and avoid close interactions with anyone from outside their household. Unfortunately, these recommendations are likely to contradict what’s spelled out in your custody arrangement. Your situation may become even more tenuous if you discover that your ex-partner’s household poses a serious COVID-19 risk.

Understand the Common COVID-19 Risks

It’s important to recognize what is and isn’t a COVID-19 risk. For example, if your ex-partner is a surgeon who operates on patients every day, or his or her current partner is an EMS worker who transports ill and injured people for 12 hours per day, several days per week, these are risks for COVID-19. Even if your ex-partner takes precautions, he or she does have a higher-than-average risk for contracting COVID-19 and bringing it home to the rest of the household, and possibly yours. In this case, your ex-spouse may say that he or she isn’t doing anything wrong, but you could petition for temporary full custody until a vaccine is available. You could also ask that your ex-partner self-quarantine for two weeks or get a negative COVID-19 test result before spending time around your child.

Take Action If You Learn About Risky Behaviors

You may also find out that your ex-partner isn’t taking the recommended public health precautions seriously. Perhaps your child told you that the other parent had a huge party with no social distancing. Maybe your ex-partner never wears a mask. These are high-risk behaviors that put your child at a much higher risk of getting COVID-19 and bringing it home to you after spending time with the other parent. If this is your situation, it’s important to speak with our divorce lawyer. You may have legal means of keeping your child out of harm’s way if you can prove that your ex-partner is endangering your child due to a disregard for public health measures.

Be Flexible During an Urgent Situation

During these times, you’ll need to be flexible. Perhaps your ex-spouse was exposed to someone with COVID-19 or develops symptoms and seeks a test. While waiting on the test result, they should self-isolate. If you find out your ex-partner is self-isolating due to COVID-19, it’s your right to seek a temporary halt to visitation.

What You Can Do After the Fact

If you’ve been sharing custody since the COVID-19 crisis was declared a pandemic by the World Health Organization, you’re likely already stressed and fatigued. Now isn’t the time to let your guard down. COVID-19 will take advantage of any lapse in preventive measures. If your child comes back to your home after a weekend with the other parent, and you find out that the other parent is sick, you may be able to take action and protect your child under Pennsylvania law. The situation can be complicated because of HIPAA, but if you believe your child was exposed to COVID-19 by your ex-partner, it’s your right to have your child tested.

You need to make important decisions about the health and well-being of your child and family. The Law Office of Joanne Kleiner offers legal counsel to help you navigate these challenging times. To schedule a consultation with our divorce lawyer in Jenkintown, call (215) 886-1266, or complete our online contact form.

Oct 24

Distance Learning and Co-Parenting During COVID-19

How Remote Learning Can Impact Co-Parenting

Over 7.8 million people in the United States have contracted COVID-19 as of mid-October 2020, grinding much of normal life to a halt. Though children have largely resumed school remotely, this change has presented many challenges to co-parents. Discussing these challenges is a must for those who want to successfully navigate the crisis.

Basic Disruptions

Some of the most common distance learning disruptions for co-parents are among the most obvious. These are the issues that are going to wreak havoc with the careful balancing that is necessary for co-parenting, and they will generally have to be solved through the efforts of each parent. Such disruptions include the children no longer taking the bus to and from a parent’s home, children not being able to see the usual babysitters because of social distancing requirements, or even difficulties that come from having to use technology that is unfamiliar to one or both of the parents.

The truth is that education is rarely an easy topic for co-parents, even when they are on the same page, so there will have to be changes made to daily life that won’t necessarily impact the existing parenting plan. It may be necessary for one or both parents to reach out to one another (or a divorce lawyer) to discuss new solutions or make adjustments that could have a minor impact on the plans that have already been put in place during prior discussions.

Responsibilities and Rights

More pressing are those disruptions that are going to impact the responsibilities and rights of the parents as put forth in a parenting agreement. Distance learning is going to put a significant amount of stress on all parties involved because it is going to require an entirely new type of parental decision-making to succeed. Parents will be forced to make educational decisions every day that simply might not be covered in the plans that were put in place when custody was first decided.

One of the biggest decisions that will have to be made will occur when, and if, school districts open. If parents are given a choice to send their kids back or keep them at home, it’s not always necessarily clear how individuals who share joint physical and legal custody will make that decision. Parents won’t be able to split the decision in this case, and even if they could, doing so would be ineffective. The basic right to decide where your child goes to school may well be disrupted by this pandemic.

Ability and Presence

Distance learning will also bring with it a major parenting change due to the amount of time the impacted children will be at home. If your child is a distance learner, he or she will need someplace to do schoolwork and study. Co-parents must now decide if they have living situations that are conducive to this kind of education and what’s going to happen if either parent goes back to working in person while the children are still going to school online.

A parent who typically has custody on the weekends, for example, may not necessarily be too impacted. Parents who tend to switch custody weekly or by the semester, on the other hand, are going to have to figure out whether their children can adequately learn as they switch back and forth. School does tend to give a certain sense of stability to children who move between homes, and the lack of stability is going to have an impact on the entire family. Without a clear plan in place, this can quickly become chaotic and disruptive to the lives of all who are involved.

Quarantine and Custody Challenges

Who gets custody during a quarantine? What happens if a child is forced to social distance because of an impacted family member and cannot travel to the other parent’s house? These are important questions that don’t have easy answers. Although people need to follow the laws surrounding public safety and use common sense, there’s no doubt that parents are going to see their custody dates disrupted anytime a child is forced to isolate for two weeks. Given that these aren’t just questions of custody but of safety, one must expect the discussions here to be quite serious. Unfortunately, there are unlikely to be any easy answers.

Distance learning is going to cause problems for most co-parents even if they are small ones. Anything relating to the COVID-19 pandemic will eventually lead to a reevaluation of plans, and custody arrangements are no exception. If you need help with custody arrangements or other family matters, make sure to contact the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner to consult a divorce lawyer in Jenkintown, Pennsylvania, either by phone at (215) 886-1266 or email via our contact page.

Jun 02

What Co-Parents Shouldn’t Do During COVID-19

4 Things Separated Parents Should Avoid During COVID-19

Due to the COVID-19 crisis, courthouses across all of Pennsylvania’s 67 counties are closed. However, this does not suspend a parent’s obligations under their custody agreements as courts may still get involved in the future. Here is some advice on four things to avoid during the pandemic so that you can stay out of trouble.

1. Do Not Keep the Child From the Other Parent

While you may not feel safe having your child switch between homes during a pandemic, this is what the court order says. That agreement is still valid during COVID-19. In fact, stay-at-home orders specifically state that transportation for custody arrangements takes precedence over the lockdown.

One parent cannot decide to keep the child if the other parent has a right to custodial time. This can lead to a contempt of court charge. It may even be enough for the court to grant a remote hearing and get involved. In other words, this is a serious matter that could result in punishment.

2. Do Not Make Unilateral Decisions

Co-parenting and shared custody agreements are still in effect, even if courts are closed and normal life is upended. No matter the national level of crisis, parents are still expected to work with each other to the extent mandated by the custody agreement.

Unless the agreement says otherwise, a parent cannot act to make a decision about the schedule or medical care for the child without input from the other parent. The COVID-19 crisis cannot be used as an excuse to upend the custody agreement. Make sure to follow the same procedures that you always would when making decisions on behalf of the children. While you may not be found in contempt of court today, there is the chance that this could happen when the other parent is finally able to get a hearing. If there are concerns, they should be discussed, but one parent does not get the sole right to make decisions.

3. Do Not Be Hostile

Everyone is under stress right now. However, the texts and emails that you send can always be admitted into a later court hearing as evidence used against you. A pattern of hostile communication can always be grounds for the court to amend the custody arrangement at a later date. That’s why a child custody attorney would advise a client to be civil no matter what.

Courts want to see a cooperative co-parenting relationship between the spouses. They do not want to see hostility in communications. Even if the courthouse is not open now, a judge will be able to see how the two parents dealt with each other during a time of crisis. Thus, this is the time to take the high road, even if the other parent has been uncivil to you first.

4. Do Not Take the Court’s Time Unless It’s Critical

Family law courts are going to be backed up for the foreseeable future. Courts are not holding in-person hearings right now due to COVID-19, and there is not a concrete answer as to when they will fully reopen. There are emergency matters that are being heard remotely.

However, you need to be careful with what you consider an emergency. Know that judges are backed up right now and only want to focus on matters that are absolutely vital. They may not want to take the time to deal with something that they do not consider to be a priority. Simple issues such as pickup times and who should provide transportation to after-school activities will not be considered matters of vital importance. Thus, you should use discretion in deciding what to file with the court right now.

If you need advice on the impacts of COVID-19 on your particular custodial situation, turn to a child custody attorney at the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner. We’re prepared to help you throughout the COVID-19 crisis and beyond after the lockdown is lifted. Call us today at (215) 886-1266 for your initial consultation at our office in Jenkintown.

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