Roughly half of all marriages in the United States end in divorce, and divorce rates are higher among those over the age of 55 compared to all other age groups. While a divorce might have to be resolved in court, it’s possible to do so through mediation. However, it’s important to understand exactly what the process entails so that you can make the most of your time and money spent there.
Not All Mediators Are the Same
It’s true that the mediator that is retained will serve as a neutral party who seeks to facilitate a conversation. However, your mediator’s background will play a significant role in how your case plays out. For example, if you and your spouse are struggling to resolve issues related to property division, it may be best to find a mediator who has experience in the financial sector.
If you’re struggling to resolve issues related to child custody or support, it may be best to work with a child psychologist. Of course, there are mediators who simply serve as neutral parties with no specific professional background.
Mediation Isn’t Just a Way to Save Money
Mediation is often thought of as a process that low-income people use to save money during the divorce process. However, the truth is that anyone can benefit from mediation regardless of their financial status. This is because people of all income levels generally experience the same emotions or have the same general desire to end their marriage as quickly and equitably as possible. Parents also tend to have the same urge to protect their children regardless of how much money they have, and mediation can be an effective way to shield kids from the toxic side of divorce settlement proceedings.
You Don’t Need to Agree for Mediation to Work
Many people believe that mediation only works if you are on the same page about key issues. Of course, if you were on the same page as your spouse, there would likely be no need for mediation at all. In fact, there is a good chance that you would still be together if everything was going smoothly within the relationship.
Mediation allows you to express yourself openly and honestly without feeling judged by your spouse or anyone else in the room. In many cases, the ability to engage in such a manner makes it easier for each side to drop their guard and negotiate in a collaborative manner.
It’s important to understand that the mediator’s role is to anticipate power dynamics within a relationship and work to neutralize them. This means that your spouse won’t be able to use the fact that he or she earned all the money in the marriage as a tool to get you to agree to a bad deal.
There Are No Winners or Losers
You may think that your gender, economic status or other variables might preclude you from getting a fair deal in a mediated settlement. However, the truth is that the mediator will work with both sides to ensure that each person walks away with what they need.
Ultimately, the goal is not to win or lose the negotiation. Instead, the goal is to simply express yourself and to work in good faith with your spouse and the mediator. It is important to note that mediation probably isn’t in your best interest if you or your spouse aren’t interested in reaching a consensus.
Instead, it may be in your best interest to hire a divorce lawyer and head straight to court to have outstanding issues resolved by a judge. However, it’s not uncommon for one or both parties to initially take a cold or condescending approach to mediation before eventually softening over the course of a session or over the course of multiple sessions.
If you are in need of a Pennsylvania divorce lawyer who has experience with the mediation process, don’t hesitate to contact the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner today. You can do so by calling the Montgomery County office at 215-886-1266 or by sending a fax to 215-886-2670.