Law Office of Joanne Kleiner

Archives for January 2023

Jan 18, 2023

Some losses that divorce might cause

Unexpected Losses a Divorce Could Cause

As you seek an end to your marriage, it can be difficult to understand what your life will look like after the divorce is finalized. Over 630,000 people obtained a divorce in 2020, many of whom encountered similar challenges. Along with the expected losses of personal possessions and finances, there might also be some unexpected losses that affect you in the weeks and months following your divorce.

Being Unable to Share in Your Child’s Disappointments or Achievements

One of the most significant losses after a divorce is the inability to share in your child’s disappointments or achievements. If your child aces a test or gets into their dream college, you and your ex-spouse likely won’t share these important events.

However, you may be able to adjust to this loss after some time has passed. For instance, your friends can share in your pleasure. The relationship you have with your ex-spouse could also become more amicable over time, which might allow for these events to be shared without any tension or feelings of anger being added to the mix.

Losing Some of Your Close Friends When Sides Are Taken

You might notice in the immediate aftermath that some people you were good friends with while you were married are avoiding you or no longer conversing with you as often. During this time, you’ll be able to determine who your actual friends are. If you have people who still hang out with you even though you aren’t married, they are still your friends. These individuals can give you the support you need as you adjust to a non-married life.

Losing Out on Financial Security

The sudden drop in finances that occurs following a divorce can be difficult to handle if you’ve never been in this situation. You might begin to wonder when you’ll be able to retire or if you’ll have difficulties finding a place to live. While your budget may be smaller, being more focused on how you spend your money can be advantageous in the long run.

Whether you live on a lower income or focus on finding more work, there are a couple of options you have to reduce the anxiety that comes with being in a new financial situation. Many people find that they have more time after a divorce to tend to their finances. If you’re still in the midst of a divorce and want to take steps to protect your finances, call our Pennsylvania divorce lawyer today to ask questions and schedule a consultation.

Losing Your Best Friend

If you’ve considered your spouse to be your best friend but find that your marriage just isn’t working, getting a divorce can make you feel like you’ve just lost the person you were closest with. The connections that were built up during a marriage will likely dissipate in the months following.

Whether your ex-spouse would do the taxes every year or would know exactly what to do when you were sick because of their profession, being unable to speak with this person in the future can be a shock to the system. With time, however, it becomes possible to build different connections and find new resources. You could also take this time to develop skills that you weren’t interested in before.

Losing Shared Memories and Traditions

Another loss that many people have after getting a divorce involves losing the shared memories and traditions that naturally develop throughout a marriage. If you have children, you might have created some holiday traditions over the years. Maybe you went camping regularly with your family as a way to spend some quality time together.

In the time immediately following a divorce, taking part in these traditions and activities can be painful. Keep in mind, however, that you have the ability to make new celebrations and traditions with your friends or children.

Losing Out on the Future You Were Building Towards

There are times when the loss of the dreams and hopes you might have had during your marriage can weigh you down. If these dreams are no longer achievable, they can make way for new ones that are entirely your own. As is the case with most of the potential losses in this guide, time is a healer of all wounds.

Once you’ve accepted that your life isn’t the same as it was, you might be able to move on and look to a future that’s just as appealing. Everyone goes through different losses when they obtain a divorce. Even though they can be difficult to manage at the beginning, acknowledging and accepting these losses should make it easier to navigate them.

If you are currently weighing the possibility of filing for a divorce and would like some advice or legal representation, call our New Jersey divorce lawyer today at (215) 886-1266 to schedule your first appointment.

Jan 14, 2023

Divorce and managing your emotions

Manage Your Emotions During a Divorce

No one wants to go through a divorce, but in some cases, it is inevitable. You may feel many conflicting emotions, such as guilt, relief, or anger. No matter what you do, it is crucial to keep those emotions in check.

Acknowledge Your Feelings

It is important to express your feelings, but you cannot keep dwelling on them, especially those negative thoughts. Ruminating about issues, problems, or events that trouble you will only make matters worse. When you are thinking about your situation, write down any thoughts. Writing your ideas down allows you to think through them more carefully. With that, you will not overreact when certain situations develop.

Consider writing down a few concerns about your legal issues. Additionally, think about what you want to ask your attorney. You will see some progress in your emotional health by taking a few minutes to think critically about your situation. While it may seem like you are not in control of the problem, writing out your concerns will allow you to manage the situation mentally.

During the divorce process, you may also experience frustration with your estranged spouse. Sometimes, they could make the process extremely difficult for you. When emotions run high in your marriage, it is not a good idea to deal directly with your spouse, but it is crucial to deal with your feelings. Instead of letting your emotions get the best of you, write a letter to your estranged spouse. You might not send it, but it allows you to express your emotions on paper.

Focus on the Future

Reliving bad memories can be a damaging and unhealthy habit. If you keep reliving the bad times, you will keep yourself trapped in those moments. Along with that, those situations or people will continue to have power over you.

If you go back to the beginning of your relationship and think about those happy moments, it can be harder to move through the divorce process. You might even feel like you are mourning a death. Yes, a divorce is an end to the marriage, but you will need to continue to move forward with your life. It is important to control your emotions and think about what’s ahead for you.

Now is the time to make plans for the future. This type of thinking can allow you to keep your emotions in check. Instead of focusing on the negativity, you should concentrate on what your life will be like in the next year. A divorce can allow you to focus on your goals and dreams. For this reason, it can help to have a divorce lawyer handle the legal process while you focus on your emotional well-being.

Speak to the Right Professional

While you might have a great relationship with your divorce attorney, they cannot solve every issue. Before calling your lawyer, check with friends, family members, or a support group. Lawyers are the right people to handle legal matters, but they are not trained therapists. Consider finding a licensed counselor or therapist who works with clients through a divorce. These professionals will be able to support you and give you a few tips to manage your emotions and other aspects of your life during a divorce.

Unfortunately, divorces can stir up plenty of emotions. While some people are great at handling problems on their own, many need to seek professional help. A therapist can help you look more rationally at the situation. Many attorneys even partner with mental health professionals to help serve their clients. No one wants you to struggle on your own. They have the resources to help you navigate the divorce process and come out the other side emotionally stronger.

Need Some Help With Your Divorce Case?

A divorce can be a complex and challenging process, especially when emotions are involved. You might want to contact a divorce lawyer to help you navigate the legal process and understand your options. Reach out to the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner at 215-886-1266 for a consultation about your Philadelphia divorce case.