divorce mediation

Oct 05

Why Divorce Mediation May Be a Better Option for You

Why Divorce Mediation Works for All Parties

As of 2022, the median cost of a divorce in the United States is $7,000. Contested divorces with a wide range of disagreements require court settlements that may cost upwards of $20,000. Instead of dealing with the publicity, expense and long duration of a court battle, you may be able to work out areas of disagreement through divorce mediation. In addition to hiring a divorce lawyer to represent you, working with a divorce mediator helps you protect your long-term financial security and your short-term and long-term well-being.

What Does a Mediator Do?

A mediator acts as a neutral third party in order to manage the discussion and conflict between the estranged spouses. The goal of a mediator is to resolve disputes in a way that satisfies the interest of both partners. When people feel respected and listened to, they’re more likely to compromise and make fair and thoughtful decisions. Mediators would equalize the playing field and power level, even if there were a significant imbalance during the marriage.

How Is a Mediator Different from an Attorney?

A mediator has training and skills in resolving problems and managing conflicts. They help create agreements and use creative problem-solving skills to negotiate terms. A mediator starts by identifying where two parties agree. Then, they progress to determining and isolating the areas of disagreement and resolving them in a step-by-step, logical matter. Finally, the needs of both parties are acknowledged as essential and treated equally between the two parties.

An attorney has to represent their client with vigor. They work in competition with the opposing party in an adversarial environment. Attorneys use legal procedures to resolve points of conflict. Attorneys typically have an assertive problem-solving style, while mediators focus on cooperation.

What Are the Advantages of Choosing Divorce Mediation?

When you choose the process of divorce mediation, the settlement is in your control. When you retain control, you feel more at ease and less stressed. You can focus on settling areas of disagreement instead of negative feelings about your ex-spouse. Because you and your ex-spouse directly work with the mediator to create the settlement, both parties are more likely to uphold it. As a result, mediated divorces are more successful and less likely to end up in court.

A mediator charges less per hour than a divorce lawyer. When you and your estranged spouse have a lot of areas of disagreement, fighting it out in court could get expensive. Working it out with a mediator won’t cost as much, and you’ll be able to start your new life on a better financial foundation. In mediation, you have a cooperative mindset, while litigation creates an aggressive and belligerent attitude.

Working with a mediator keeps your business private. If you don’t want the public to know all of the details of what went wrong in your marriage or who gets what in the settlement process, working with a mediator preserves more of your privacy. Discussions with a mediator are private and confidential.

Working with a mediator reduces their burden if you and your spouse have minor children. They may not experience the anxiety and fear that come with a contested divorce that goes to court. When the two of you aren’t fighting and arguing about everything, you can focus your emotional energy on your child’s well-being and emotional health, as well as yourself. Mediation also shows responsible behavior and models the ability to have calm, productive discussions with a person, even if you don’t like them. Children are less likely to feel like pawns in a divorce when their parents work with a mediator.

If you are thinking about ending your marriage in a less-stressful manner, contact the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner in Jenkintown, Pennsylvania at (215) 886-1266 to schedule a consultation. You may also fill out our contact form, and an office associate will promptly contact you to set up an appointment.

May 08

Why You Should Try Divorce Mediation

Explore the Benefits of Divorce Mediation

Since it has a high success rate, mediation is one of the most effective forms of handling a divorce. Why does mediation work so well? More and more couples are choosing this process because it provides several benefits.

The Whole Process Is Faster

If you just want your divorce to be over with, mediation is the way to go. One of the big benefits of mediation is that it’s far quicker than going through the courts. When your case is decided in front of a judge, you must wait months for your court date. Depending on your situation, you may have to wait weeks while you file paperwork and send documentation back and forth. Mediation is a lot more straightforward. You schedule your meetings, attend each session for an hour or two, and then go on your way. In most cases, mediation is completed in four to 10 weeks.

You Have Less Stress

Of course, a good divorce lawyer will manage a lot of the difficult parts of the process for you, but it’s still stressful to have to go to court and argue your case in front of a judge. Since mediation is more cooperative, it has an entirely different tone. You don’t have to feel like the law is getting involved, and you don’t have to feel like you’re having a confrontation. Instead, it’s simply you and your estranged spouse sitting down with a few helpful advisors while you figure things out.

Your Discussions Are Confidential

Court proceedings typically become a matter of public record. If you have a contentious divorce, all your dirty laundry gets aired to the public. Anyone who is interested can pull court documents and learn about your relationship and your finances. If this sounds too awkward for you, you should try mediation. Mediation is a private matter. If desired, you can even negotiate nondisclosure agreements to further safeguard your privacy.

Your Children Are Less Affected

If you have children, mediation is especially helpful. By working with the other parent, you maintain a more positive relationship with your co-parent. Mediation reduces the chances of an acrimonious divorce that can lead to years of disagreements with your child’s other parent. It also keeps your kids from being involved. They don’t have to testify in court and feel like they’re getting dragged into your disagreements with their other parent.

It’s More Affordable

If you’re worried about losing money in a divorce, mediation is a good option. Divorce mediation costs are usually around 40% to 60% lower than traditional divorce costs. Part of this is due to the simplicity of mediation. You don’t have to hire a divorce lawyer to carefully prepare court arguments and spend hours negotiating with your ex’s divorce attorney. Mediation is also more affordable because it’s over faster and has fewer court filing fees associated with it.

You Have More Control

If you decide to take your estranged spouse to court for a divorce, you end up relying on the judge’s discretion. The court will decide what it deems fair and make a ruling you’re legally bound to follow. This can lead to problems like your spouse ending up with the house you renovated or you obtaining one of your spouse’s family heirlooms. If you want to avoid these issues, mediation is a good idea. You’re entirely in control, so you get to decide how your assets should be divided. You can also make more flexible arrangements regarding issues like pet custody or reduced child support.

Mediation is definitely simpler and less contentious, but it’s still a good idea to have a knowledgeable lawyer on your side. At the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner, we can help guide you through the mediation process. Our Jenkintown team is here to handle the paperwork, collect evidence for you and represent your side of the story. We can oversee everything from child custody to alimony. To learn more about our services, call (215) 886-1266, or fill out our contact form.

Apr 04

How to Handle Your Spouse’s Refusal of Divorce Mediation

Motivating Your Spouse to Agree to Divorce Mediation

Many divorce lawyers advise divorce mediation over the alternatives. Mediation results in an agreement in as many as 80% of all U.S. divorces that go through the process. Mediated divorces are finalized in three to six months on average compared to the two-year average span for litigated divorces, which can cost up to 10 times as much overall.

Identify the Reasons for the Refusal

It can be difficult, but strive to see the refusal through the eyes of your spouse. The most common reason a person refuses mediation is because they do not want to get divorced. If this is your situation, then you may not be ready for mediation and should seek marriage counseling instead.

Recognize That an Angry Spouse May Be a Deal-Breaker

If your spouse is hurt, there may be nothing you can do to change their mind. You can hope that counseling will work, but if you are beyond that point, you may have to shift focus. Also, many divorce lawyers agree that situations involving domestic violence cannot be mediated.

Manage Your Stress and Be Patient

If you move forward with counseling, it is advisable that together you choose someone who is a pro-marriage therapist who will advocate for your marriage. You should also approach this process with an open mind. It is also important that you manage your stress, and be patient. Your spouse likely will come to the table eventually, and it will still be on a shorter timetable than a litigated divorce would require.

Educate Your Spouse on Divorce Mediation

Many people do not know what mediation is. It may be human nature to see divorce as winning and losing. Truth is, there are no winners in a divorce, and mediation concerns mitigating the losses.

The Initial Process

In Pennsylvania, estranged couples can make the initial choice to go through mediation before any divorce paperwork is filed with the court. However, in the converse situation, judges will in many cases order that mediation take place, especially if there are child custody issues involved.

Offer to Pay for the First Mediation Session

You may be able to use that fact to motivate your spouse to go voluntarily. You may also want to offer to pay for the first session. A single mediation session is relatively inexpensive, and it allows your spouse the experience without any sense that they may be taken advantage of.

Recommend Your Spouse Retain an Attorney

Just because you decided to pursue mediation or if it has been ordered by the court does not mean that either of you have to go it alone. You are each entitled to have the assistance of separate family law attorneys to represent your respective interests and, if an agreement is reached, review its terms before it is signed and presented to the court.

Continue the Decoupling Process

Unless counseling has led to a change of heart for you, in which case this is all moot, it is important that you continue the process of decoupling yourself from the marriage. This process, which should be gentle and purposeful, is important on two fronts. It is important for your mental health and preparation for single life, and you may even want to attend individual counseling as this process unfolds. It is also important for your spouse so that they acclimate to the fact the marriage is coming to an end.

Mediate a Successful Divorce

If you are ready to move on from your Pennsylvania marriage but want to do so without bitterness and acrimony, divorce mediation is an excellent way to achieve that. At the Law Office of Joanne E. Kleiner, we have more than 25 years of experience helping couples mediate their divorces and would welcome the opportunity to assist you. Call our office in Jenkintown at 215-886-1266 or contact us online to schedule a consultation with an experienced divorce attorney.

Jan 03

Is Your Mediation Agreement Legally Binding?

Are You Legally Required to Abide by Mediation Decisions?

More and more divorcing couples are choosing to get mediation instead of arguing in court. If you have tried or are considering trying mediation, it’s helpful to know just how legally binding the process is. Here is what you need to know about whether or not divorce mediation is legally binding.

Are You Legally Required to Get Mediation?

In most cases, mediation is entirely optional. People usually decide to get it when they want to divorce and keep things as amicable as possible. However, usually, you have the right to forego mediation if you don’t think it will work for your situation.

There are a few exceptions to this rule though. The court can order a couple to enter mediation if they think that would benefit the family. This is a special type of mediation called court-ordered mediation. If you have court-ordered mediation, you are legally bound to show up for your mediation sessions. You don’t necessarily have to be talkative during the session, but if you skip it, you could be found in contempt of the court.

Another reason you might be legally bound to go through the mediation process is if you signed a prenup saying you would. Many prenuptial agreements include a clause that says you have to go into mediation if you want to end the marriage. Skipping mediation at this point could result in civil lawsuits or other penalties.

Do You Have to Follow the Mediator’s Recommendations?

During your mediation session, the mediator will hear both sides of the story. You and your ex can get a mediation lawyer to present your case and explain the solution you want. After hearing all the facts, your mediator might make suggestions for how you should proceed.

Keep in mind that the mediator is not a judge. What they say is not a final ruling that you are legally bound to follow. Instead, the mediator is just there to guide the discussion in a proactive manner. Whether or not you choose to follow any suggestions from the mediator is up to you.

Which Mediation Documents Are Actually Legally Binding?

The process of just talking with a mediator is not legally binding. However, usually, the whole point of mediation is for you and your ex to create a legal document that you both agree on. Depending on your circumstances, your mediation attorney might prepare documents like child custody arrangements, asset transfer agreements, or child support schedules.

Unless your mediation is court-ordered, you have the option of walking away without signing any documents. It’s very important to only sign legal agreements in mediation if you agree with them. Once you sign them, they are just as legally binding as any child custody or asset division settlement your divorce lawyer helps you get in court.

What Should You Do If You’re Not Happy With Your Mediation Outcome?

You cannot just shrug and quit paying your child custody because you sorted it out in mediation instead of in court. However, that doesn’t mean you are stuck with your mediation agreement forever. Just like any other legal agreement, you might have options to contest or appeal the decision.

In some cases, you can argue that the mediation contract is not valid due to irregularities such as being signed under duress. Mediation usually isn’t recommended for couples dealing with domestic violence, because one can intimidate the other into signing something unfair. Another option for changing your agreement is petitioning the court for an adjustment. Since some agreements, like child support, are ongoing, you can alter them when circumstances drastically change. This means that things like getting a new job or moving may let you make some changes to your mediation agreement.

If you’re considering mediation, the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner is here to help. We are happy to offer mediation and explain how it works. And if you’re unsatisfied with a previously mediated agreement, our divorce lawyer team can help you explore your options further. Call our Jenkintown office at 215-886-1266 or fill out our online contact form to learn more.

Sep 20

Divorce Mediation May Be the Answer

Some Things to Expect From Divorce Mediation

Did you know that mediation can produce an agreement in up to 80% of cases? With the divorce rate at about 50% of all marriages in the U.S., this is a solution that has had a dramatic increase. There are some things to expect from a divorce lawyer during a mediation session.

Discussions With Structure

You will want a mediator who opens structured discussions concerning the division of assets, custody arrangements and payment of support. You will need to reveal your finances. Talking about your goals for after the divorce should be encouraged.

If the discussion goes off-topic, a good mediator will steer the talk back to the subject. Emotions may be high, and the session should not be used for counseling. You may want to bring any supporting documentation with you to the meeting.

An Experienced Mediation and Divorce Lawyer

A local and experienced mediator should be your choice. Since the divorce process is easier with those who have local knowledge, finding a mediator through the internet is not a good choice. A lawyer who practices in your jurisdiction will be the best source. An attorney will know the laws of your area and can help prevent costly mistakes.

Guidance From a Professional

In its origins, mediation did not include any guidance from those who ran the sessions. Many of the traditional mediators still use this method when conducting divorce mediation. Mediators may not give you specific legal advice, but they can advise you on how your case may play out in court. They know what is considered fair and the rule-of-thumb in your area.

Mediators will work with you and your estranged spouse with a focus on how to settle the differences that exist. There will be no testimony or legal arguments, and the mediator will not make decisions for you. You are always free to reject a proposal made by your spouse. The mediator will let you know which issues are not open to negotiation and will clarify anything you do not understand.

No Taking of Sides

A good mediator should be neutral, especially when dealing with divorce, when emotions may surface. This is especially important when discussing custody and support. If you think that your mediator has a bias, it may be time to find a new professional to conduct the sessions.

Something Not to Expect From Divorce Mediation

There is one thing you should be aware of. Mediation is not a way to gain an advantage over your spouse. You will not get better results if you are the higher-earning spouse. Mediation should not be used to keep your spouse from hiring an attorney for representation. If this is the case, most likely, your mediation will not succeed.

The Benefits of Divorce Mediation

The divorce process is never easy. However, divorce mediation may make it run more smoothly and less stressfully. Divorce can affect you both financially and emotionally. Mediation is usually less expensive than a litigated and contested divorce. Another advantage is that communication is more open, and cases may reach a conclusion more quickly. The goal is to find solutions that work for everyone.

In order to reach an agreement, you must be open to compromise and be willing to listen to your spouse’s point of view. Although you may not understand it, you can still listen. Listening closely may help you think of a new way to resolve the issue.

At the end of the negotiations, with some or all your issues resolved, you will have a written agreement. In some cases, a parenting schedule or plan may be included. If you have not been able to agree on all the issues, you will have to do so or let the judge decide after a court hearing.

We are your local divorce lawyer and can help you with the process of mediation. Our Pennsylvania offices are located in Montgomery County, Bucks County and Philadelphia County. Call the Law Offices of Joanne Kleiner at (215) 886-1266 or use our contact form to arrange an appointment.