domestic violence

Sep 23

Domestic Violence Increases With Pandemic Lockdowns

Domestic Violence Surges During Pandemic

Many divorce lawyers have noted an increase in marital separations during the pandemic due to domestic violence. With the stay-at-home orders now being eased, we’re starting to learn the truth about what happened during the past few months. Even before the orders to stay home, 123 victims died from domestic violence in Pennsylvania in 2018.

A Worldwide Issue

Back in April, the United Nations Secretary-General António Guterres noted that domestic violence had increased during the pandemic as stay-at-home orders became the norm. Both social and economic pressures have led to problems within the home, a place where people should feel their safest.

In his speech, Guterres mentioned that the number of women who were calling support services had doubled. He urged that governments make it a priority to treat domestic violence as well as the coronavirus.

Families Are Stressed

At this unprecedented time, parents are struggling with economic uncertainty, financial concerns, political unrest and the possibility of COVID-19 infection. When questioned in social surveys, families reported the following emotions:

Anxiety
Feeling overwhelmed
Fear
Frustration

All this adds to the feeling of being stressed, which is hard on positive family dynamics. It is harder for people to regulate emotions when this stress occurs. Berating loved ones as well as themselves is how some people cope with the uncertainty of the times. Uncertainty may get so bad that it manifests as violence in the home. In some cases, this has occurred in homes where abusive behavior has never occurred before.

What is domestic violence? According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, “Domestic violence (also called intimate partner violence, IPV, domestic abuse or relationship abuse) is a pattern of behaviors used by one partner to maintain power and control over another partner in an intimate relationship.”

Domestic violence can be physical or emotional. For example, regular threats and intimidation are signs of IPV. When the parents in a home are feeling powerless because of outside forces, such as the COVID-19 virus, it heightens the need to regain control. This may result in aggressive behavior, both mental and physical.

There is evidence that the murder-suicide rate in which a male partner kills a female and then himself has risen since the same period last year. There is no question that stress has been a factor in many homes.

While the country re-opens, those who have locked down with an abuser may begin to seek a solution. Lawyers are already noting the spike in divorce filings. However, it may be unclear for a while just how much domestic violence increased in 2020.

Children Can Get Through Divorce

Now that full lockdown has ended here in Pennsylvania, it might be time for you to move on. Your home may no longer be a safe place, and perhaps you feel as if you are lost in the water and are not sure how you’ll get back to the safety of the shore. Your children’s welfare could be a great concern as well.

The thought of divorce brings a lot of fear to some. If you’re in this situation, reach out to friends and family. Your kids will need to rely on you, and you can provide routines that will provide care and structure, assuring them of your love in an unsettling time.

Explain the separation to your kids. They may have already witnessed the reason while you were all at home, but it should now be discussed honestly with a child-friendly explanation.

Help Is Available

The Pennsylvania Coalition Against Domestic Violence works with local programs to ensure the safety of survivors of domestic violence. Their site also offers advice for staying safe during the pandemic, both in English and in Spanish.

Whether you have experienced abuse or not, it’s important to seek help from a divorce lawyer before ending a marriage. The Law Office of Joanne Kleiner can provide the legal guidance you need. Located in Jenkintown, our office serves Montgomery County, Bucks County and Philadelphia County. Contact us online or call us at 215-886-1266 to schedule a consultation.

May 01

Lockdowns Have Contributed to More Domestic Violence

After COVID-19, You May Need a Divorce Lawyer

With the advent of lockdowns around the world, countries such as South Africa and France have seen a surge in calls to violence prevention help lines; France had an increase of 30% the first week of its coronavirus quarantine. Domestic violence in the home, often considered a safe place, has increased during this pandemic, according to the UN. Those who have experienced these issues before are now seeing more violence as proximity in quarantine with abusers is the result.

Increased Anxiety and Stressors

Loss of jobs, stay-at-home orders, having to practice social or physical distancing, the threat of being sick, and depressing, scary news all contribute to a general feeling of anxiety that has increased during the coronavirus pandemic. A husband or wife who was somewhat abusive before may now become increasingly violent or mentally abusive as frustration deepens. An abuser may withhold medicine, give the wrong information regarding the pandemic, get angry when help with the household is suggested, and be violent. Often, abuse takes the form of emotional and physical torment.

Staying Safe During COVID-19 Within Your Own Home

You may need to reach out to a help line or begin to think of distancing yourself from your abuser. This means leaving your home for a place that is safe from domestic violence. The next step would be talking to a lawyer who can help with divorce and separation, or, in cases without violence, mediation.

Keeping Your Family Safe During and After the Pandemic

You want your children to be safe from all kinds of abuse as well as the virus. If you are thinking of leaving an abusive situation, it is important to do the following:

Tell your kids the truth.
Say “I love you” to them.
Prepare them for a change of address.
Avoid blame.

Keep explanations simple. Acknowledge their feelings and let them be honest with you. Kids need to know that it is not their fault; however, if they have been in a stay-at-home situation, they may already know why you are thinking of a divorce. Having seen physical or psychological abuse close up, your children may not need explanations.

Separation and Divorce

With every household situation being different, you may need a customized solution that is geared toward important issues. You don’t need more squabbles when you’re trying to resolve your family problems in stressful times.

In some cases, separation agreements may be the first step in distancing you and your family from a chaotic home or one where a spouse is making life difficult. To add to the problem, being cooped up with an unhappy person adds to the chaos and disruption. It increases the stress that everyone is feeling during the pandemic. A new layer of stress has been added as people are now in quarantine together whether they like it or not.

As witnessed in China, the divorce rate reportedly spiked across two provinces as quarantine restrictions were lifted. Relationships were very affected by the pandemic in that country. According to Time magazine, the number of domestic violence cases in China reported to the local police tripled in February of 2020 compared to February of 2019.

If your partner is physically abusive and you have injuries, you should not let the fear of this virus prevent you from seeking medical attention. Fear should not also be allowed to prevent you from separating yourself from an abusive partner during the pandemic. You may now be at the stage, even if abuse is not part of your situation, where you are contemplating divorce. Know that you are not alone in this. Caring help is just a phone call or text away whether to a domestic violence hotline or to our office.

If you have experienced domestic violence problems or are thinking of contacting a Pennsylvania divorce lawyer, give the Law Office of Joanne Kleiner a call at (215) 886-1266 today to arrange a confidential appointment in Jenkintown. We can help you go over your options and move forward with your life.

Jun 05

The Impact of a Custody Battle

Many parents who contest a court’s custody ruling, or who engage in long and protracted proceedings to establish custody and visitation arrangement will tell you that they are doing it “for the benefit of the children.” There are certainly instances where one parent must do whatever is necessary to ensure a safe outcome for children—if there’s domestic violence, alcohol or drug abuse, for example. In most cases, though, their actions are ultimately counterproductive, draining precious resources that could be better spent on the children or on improving their lives.

Here are the most frequent consequences of an unnecessary custody battle:

One or both parties spend money they can’t afford to spend—It may be money that would be used to buy clothes and food, to live in a better house, or to fund a child’s college education. Attorney’s fees can be substantial, even if the skirmish is short-lived.
The tension and conflict between the parties increases—When you are on opposite sides of an argument, it’s hard to find ways to agree…which is often in the best interests of your children. Not only will it have an impact on your health—medical professionals have long known that stress and anxiety are bad for you—but your kids will be well aware of what’s going on and will feel in the middle (or even to blame).
Co-parenting becomes difficult or impossible—Even if the issues you need to resolve involve only your children, it will be hard not to inject some of your dispute or animosity with your ex into the process. In the aftermath of divorce, your children need stability and consistency—a custody battle makes those objectives difficult to attain.
Your children will suffer—If you and your ex are taking side, your children will feel compelled to as well. They love both of you, so they’ll struggle to make both of you happy—an unattainable goal.

Contact the Law Office of Joanne E. Kleiner & Associates

For an appointment, contact our office online or call us at 215-886-1266. Let us use our experience, skill, knowledge and resources to help you make informed and effective decisions.

domestic violence